The Fat Roland blog is 11 years old today. It's finally in secondary school. It's wandering along endless corridors looking for double-maths. Happy birthday, my blog.
The three most popular subjects in the history of this site, whether it was called Fat Roland On Electronica or Netloafer or Fat Roland's Oozy Bleeps or whatever, are:
> Anything about Aphex Twin. Does he have a new album? Where's the new album? What is an album? Why do my trousers hurt? Click here to read more about Aphex Twin. Of the 900+ subjects listed in the menu below, this has been the biggie. Maybe not so much now he's deluging the net with material.
> The time an Autechre album got leaked on my blog. That was a bit weird. The whole internet came looking for it. "Hey, mate, you seen the new Ae album?" "Yeah, out the back, mate." [holds door open] Click here to see the leak (go to the comments) (please pay money for music, thanks).
> The best-album lists in the fag ends of each year. Click here for the best albums of 2014 - but there are others, going back to 2009. I'm already working on this year's list. I have a longlist of 104 albums. My ears are hanging off my face like wrong spittle.
I look at the internet and I think "if there was only a way to easily have a conversation online". Blogging allows this conversation to happen. Blogs, a word which is short for "web logs", are the future and-- wait, hold on, the phone's ringing.
Hello? Yes, speaking? Sorry, what? Twit-what? No I've not heard of a "Face book". Does it have actual faces? Hello? Hello? Are you there? Don't hang up. You're the first person I've spoken to for 11 years. It's so... quiet here. I'm cold. Hug me. Please. Just for a while. What? Yes, I'll hold.