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Mar 5, 2017

Death of a computer: what I discovered while nozzling out the dust


My computer died. Again. It was inevitable - I'd been "downloading" spray cheese into its portals for eight years.

Before I took it to the PC place to get it either cremated or resurrected as some kind of blue-screen zombie, I opened it up to hoover out the inside. This is what I found.

> Dust.

> Rust.

> Musk.

> Clippings, various types.

> A skellington (not pictured).

> Steve Brookstein (pictured), despite the restraining order.

> A small commune of reasonably successful dog walkers.

> The momentary tension between smugness and embarrassment when a friend spots you browsing creative writing books in the local library.

> Sixteen black holes, one of which may just be a big spider.

> The A56.

> Spray cheese. To be honest, this one wasn't a surprise.