Happy birthday to me and definitely not to Jesus

It's my birthday today, so I should make some kind of public address. Like wot the Queen did, except she speeched herself on Jesus's birthday and not on her own birthday. Did Jesus ever make a speech on the Queen's birthday? No, he did not. Selfish.

I'm 52 years old today. That makes me the same age as the B-52's, or twice as old as Aphex Twin's remix compilation 26 Mixes for Cash. Or four times as old as Blur's album 13. That's how ages work, right?

I can't get much of a music connection about being born in 1973. Gary Glitter was number one when I was born, something I would rather forget. I'm very close in age to the Adolescence actor Stephen Graham, and he appeared in a Deadmau5 video once. But very close is not close enough.

The only music-related thing of significance that happened on my actual birthdate was the release of Lynyrd Skynyrd's long-awaited debut album. Problem is, I know absolutely nothing about that band. I wouldn't know Larry Lynyrd or Susan Skynyrd if they slapped me in the face with a trout.

So on this least remarkable of birthdays, I suppose I should be grateful for the fact that I'm still going  And so is this website. I started this blog when I was in my early 30s. Blogger somehow hasn't disappeared into the same crypt that buried LiveJournal, MySpace or any number of obsolete web services with a scant regard for word spacing.

Wait. I've just thought of one. Energy 52. I dedicate my new age to Energy 52, the trance project produced by Cosmic Baby. I'm going to don my flip flops, slather myself in sun cream, and get sand in my crack to the sound of Café del Mar.

Happy Mar-day.

Further Fats: Because / a melon / only slightly: birthday thoughts (2012)

Further Fats: 50 (2023)

8/08: The most Roland day of the year

I got me some Roland-themed artwork.

Jim'll Paint It is a Microsoft Paint artist from Bristol, a city also famous for Massive Attack, Portishead and stool charts.

He mashes up stuff for our entertainment, usually based on prompts from the public. Wallace and Gromit as Mad Max characters? Keir Starmer as Austin Powers? Radiohead's The Bends, but it's Kryten from Red Dwarf and the album title is 'Smeghead'? Jim will indeed Microsoft Paint it.

The print I got was called Roland, at it features Roland from Grange Hill brandishing three Roland synthesisers: a TB-303, a TR-808 and an SH-101. Oh and he's flanked by Roland Rat because of course he is.

By the way, I've been revamping my home decor. Ten years ago, I was running my first ever Edinburgh Fringe run, so to mark the anniversary I designed an enneaptych of colourised artworks from that show. And yes, I googled 'what is a triptych but nine'. It looks pretty striking - see below.

A nice addition to the Roland-ness is that my Roland print was delivered – not intentionally, I suppose – on 8th August, or 8/08, which is the most Roland TR-808 of days. I now regret not opening the package to a soundtrack of 808 State. While eating After Eights. 808 of them.

In 2012, I had a Twitter conversation with Roland Rat, or Sir Roland Rat as he stylises himself on social media. Since Twitter got Xed out, I can no longer see the conversation, so I can't share it here. Just imagine me and the rambunctious rodent hanging out, both of us nibbling cheese and spreading plague. He'd appreciate the Rolandosity of my Roland art, I'm sure.

Further Fats: Kraftwerk Badger Spaceship: an Edinburgh free fringe show (2015)

Further Fats: In praise of 808 State's Gorgeous (which is gorgeous) (2020)

Is this illegal? Pink Pantheress ushers Underworld back to the pop charts

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, or underneath a massive blancmange painted to look like a rock, you will have heard PinkPantheress’s hit single Illegal. which is currently meandering in the middle reaches of the UK singles chart.

It’s a chirpy garage pop number that has had its opening lines snipped for numerous TikTok lip sync videos, including an especially excruciatingly routine by former Labour leader Ed Miliband. Honestly, you politicians need to stay away from good things.

What brings the track to my attention is its sampling of Underworld’s Dark & Long (Dark Train), nearly 30 years after the track rose to fame on the original Trainspotting soundtrack. Underworld’s plump synth blaps are all over the Pantheress tune, and it works really, really well. 

I’m going to embed the video for the single here, and you had better darn well listen to it. I’m also going to include Nia Archives' hyper junglist remix because Nia Archives is the bees knees and/or wasps elbows and it'll blast the cobwebs from your cup-a-soup.

Further Fats: Mmm Underworld, the world loves you (2012)

Further Fats: Smileys for miles: 10 rave culture classics that you should listen to immediately (2025)

Spending time (and space) with Jeff Mills

I recently caught up with visionary Detroit techno producer Jeff Mills. You can read the result of our meeting in issue 127 of Electronic Sound magazine.

Mills earned himself the nickname 'The Wizard' when he rose to prominence in the so-called "second wave" of Detroit techno. He co-founded the influential techno collective Underground Resistance, and he's been putting out stuff on his own Axis Records for well over 30 years,

He has produced techno scores for numerous old films, perhaps most notably for Fritz Lang's Metropolis. He's collaborated with NASA and made a black hole-themed cosmic opera. He's basically a spaceman. I interviewed a spaceman.

Mills was a lot of fun to interview. His pedigree is undeniable, so it was always going to be an easy interview. Lots to talk about. When he got onto metaphysics and telepathy, I felt my brain expanding. This is a guy who got into comic books at an early age, and he's been having wild visions ever since. So much fun.

It's always an honour to have a cover feature in Electronic Sound magazine. This now gives me extra privileges as a hotshot journalist. I can barge into any concert with the phrase "don't you know who I am". I get to ride around in one of those sedan chair things. And I get a chufty badge, which is a normal badge that I've scrawled "chufty" onto.

Other artists featured in this issue include M, as in the famous M who did Pop Muzik fame, Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark collaborator Claudia Brücken, and the quite brilliant Rival Consoles. Oh and Children Of The Bong too, whose trippy bleeps I was obsessed with in the '90s.

Blatant plug: get your Electronic Sound fix here.

Further Fats: Chosen Words: J is for Juan Atkins (2010)

Further Fats: It's just the sun rising (and being a bit too hot) (2020)

Music for scaffolders: 808 State on Top Of The Pops

I've been watching old Top Of The Pops clips. It's how us cool people spend our leisure time. Back in the 1950s, our hobbies would have been weekends in Margate or afternoons down the bingo getting razzed on prawn cocktails. Not for us modern kids.

I actually want to talk about 808 State, which won't be a surprise for regular readers of this blog. They appeared on Top Of The Pops for three of their singles. They performed their breakout hit Pacific State in November 1989 when Simon Mayo was the presenter. When Cubik hit the charts a year later, they were compered on by Anthea Turner. And Manchester DJ Gary Davies was MC when they played In Your Face in the summer of 1991. That latter programme also featured Chris Isaak, Nomad featuring MC Mikee Freedom, and Julee Cruise doing her dreamy Twin Peaks theme. 

808 State were deliciously experimental. They still are: 2019's Transmission Suite is a cold-war cooling tower of steaming creativity: chills and thrills all the way. But considering how relatively undeveloped dance music was in the late-80s, Bob State were wild. Take, for example, their 1989 album 90. It starts with the floaty hypnosis of Magical Dream, ends with the liminal industrialism of The Fat Shadow, via the acidic chatter of 808080808. Expand the discography, and we quickly reach the squelchy acid of Flow Coma, the lift music of Lift, the gospel of 10x10, and that psychedelic guitar-mageddon of Cubik. 

808's Graham Massey appeared at the Louder Than Words festival last November. He was speaking at the launch of Matthew Collin's Dream Machines, which I've written about here. At this event, he recalled playing Cubik to a record company exec from Warner Brothers. The suit didn't seem too fussed about the track, but thankfully producer Trevor Horn took the bait. Horn signed 808 State to his ZTT label, which had previously achieved hits with Art Of Noise and Frankie Goes To Hollywood. 

"We were surprised because we didn’t sound like the pop music of the time," said Graham on the interest from ZTT Records. "Trevor Horn was a great champion of what we were doing, and such a great pioneer of sonic stuff, so we felt like he really had our back."

Horn encouraged the band to edit their tracks for a radio-friendly audience. And, of course, it worked. Graham added: "I remember the thrill of hearing [our songs] on builders’ radios, those paint-splattered radios that scaffolders had, and we were like: yeah, pop music!"

Graham described the band as four individuals with colliding record collections. "It’s opulent," he said. "It’s a lot of ideas crushed and spat out into very colourful ways. We were exploring ideas. With studio time being so rare and expensive, and the equipment being so exciting, it seemed like you shouldn’t keep doing the same thing."

And he described their 90 album in particular as an exploration of ideas and a celebration of the sampler. "The sampler was such a fresh and exciting tool that we were still learning to use. Plus I was learning to be an engineer. I was trying to ape Prince records with the tiny little delays that make psychoacoustic spaces. It wasn’t just notes and musical melodies."

Thank the lucky stars and the miraculous moons that Top Of The Pops was there to promote such zany music to the masses. The programme stopped its regular broadcast nearly two decades ago, and we are poorer as a result. However, we shouldn't be too downhearted.

A few years ago, I was at a Dreadzone gig. You might remember them for bucolic protest rave tunes such as Fight The Power and Little Britain. The gig was full of crusty old folks like me. But I found myself on the front rail next to two young women: early twenties at a push, all glammed up and ready to party

"How on earth did you find out about Dreadzone?" I asked.

"The internet," they said. They had discovered the band online, at it had become their "thing". And they didn't even need Anthea Turner to help make that happen.

Further Fats: Oh, puppies, why do you live? (2006)

Further Fats: 808 State's number tracks in number order (2013)

Ultimate 90s number one: Several tragedies, a scally elf, and a bedroom musician saves the day

As I was ploughing through my daily plate of 15 full-size scotch eggs this morning, I was reflecting on the latest contenders in Ultimate 1990s Number One, my series in which I rate every number one in the 1990s UK singles chart.

Do you know what I concluded? Scotch eggs are great. I really love these scotch eggs. The ten chart-toppers I'm about to feature have some interesting aspects, but these crumb-smeared porky eggballs really are hitting the mark.

I think I might vomit. Bring on the contenders!

The contenders

All Saints: Never Ever | Blondie: Maria | East 17: Stay Another Day | Freddie Mercury: Living on My Own | Meat Loaf: I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That) | Oasis: D'You Know What I Mean? | Spacedust: Gym and Tonic | Steps: Heartbeat / Tragedy | The Verve: The Drugs Don't Work | White Town: Your Woman

I won't do these

It is a well-established fact that Meatloaf would do anything for love. As the best-selling single of 1993 clearly states, he knows it's true and that's a fact. However, the one thing Meatloat won't do for love is proceed any further in my Ultimate 90s competition. His histrionic handkerchief-clutching has no place here.

Like the Meatloaf song, I found Oasis's third chart-topper D'You Know What I Mean? to be excessive. With its overbearing strings and uninspired lyrics, it represented Oasis's descent into their OASIS period (Overblown And Stale Indie Sludge). They gain points for using morse code, but dash dash / dot / dot dot dot dot.

An actual tragedy

I would like to eliminate two further contestants. Steps' take on Tragedy is, compared to the BeeGees original, a tragedy. In the video for its other A-side Heartbeat, they battle a bunch of dwarfs. This was back in the 1990s, in the socially careless era of Friends' casual homophobia, but surely that was a, er, Steps too far.

By the time The Verve hit number one with the maudlin melodrama The Drugs Don't Work. they had lost some of their, er, verve. In your face, previous paragraph, that was way better than the Steps joke. Still, it's a bit of a tune, and sometimes the drugs don't indeed work, and we are greateful for their medical wisdom. It is eliminated because I'm looking for bleepy hits not weepy hits.

Hacienda flashback

The following tracks are undoubtedly tunes, indeed possibly bangers, but none of them progress in this competition because their bleepiness is either absent or inadequate.

I have a vague memory of seeing the early, unsuccessful version of All Saints. It may have been a ZTT Records showcase, and I think it was at the Hacienda. They were the best band of the night, but they wouldn't enjoy success until the Appleton sisters joined. Although Never Ever was made amid song writing tensions, it achieved more pre-sales than any other song in UK history. A banger.

Knocking The Offspring off the number one spot wasn't on my bingo card for Blondie. They hadn't topped the singles chart since the early 1980s. Maria came with dance remixes by Talvin Singh and NYC producers Soul Solution, with Singh totally ripping the track into fractals of drum 'n' bass tabla goodness.

As I was saying to Santa Claus the other day, we haven't had a decent Christmas number one hit for ages. East 17's Stay Another Day was a banger with baubles on. Scally elf Brian Harvey has cut quite a trouble figure in recent years. You should check out The Black Dog's Conspiracy Tapes featuring Brian's wilder rants – I think it's great, although Santa hates it because he only likes 15th century madrigals and mumble rap. 

We are (not) the champions

It would be awful to make you wade through this whole blog post only for me to tell you that none of these contenders are good enough to continue in the Ultimate 90s competition. It would be a waste of your time, it would be a waste of my time, and it probably contravenes some kind of blogging law. Fingers crossed...

When Bob Sinclair fluked a number one in summer 1998, it rode a wave of energetic French house music. But Gym & Tonic has problems. Small problem: it is inferior to the track it samples, Stardust's Music Sounds Better With You. Bigger problem: it is inferior to the original Gym Tonic by Daft Punk's Thomas Bangalter which featured workout vocals by Jane Fonda. Sorry, Bob, it's a no.

I never thought I'd say this, but here's a thumping dance tune from Freddie Mercury. Everyone's favourite moustachioed prancer dug out Living On My Own from his 1985 solo album, asked Belgian production outfit No More Brothers to remix it, and lo and behold he's knocking Take That off the number one spot. Shame he wasn't around to appreciate the song's new-found success. My only issue is that's it's annoying. Really annoying. The bit when he goes all scat? The way he says "monkey business"? Proper rubs me up the wrong way.

Please, let's have one good track. Please. I bow to the blogging gods, deliver us from musical mediocrity. PLEASE.

Worth Whiting for (sorry)

Just when I thought all was lost, here comes White Town (pictured) with the glorious Your Woman. I remember getting this sent before release, and it was so lo-fi, I wouldn't have predicted the success it had. Adamski had popularised the 'keyboard wizard' DIY synth thing years earlier, but here was a bedroom musician knocking Tori Amos off the top spot. Jyoti Mishra's still going strong, posting music programming videos, and with singles varying from sunny pop rock to dirty acid techno.

Thank you, White Town, you've saved it. Your Woman goes through to the Ultimate 90s final.

See more Ultimate 90s number ones 

Smileys for miles: 10 rave culture classics that you should listen to immediately

Look at you, sat on your sofa watching repeats of the Nine O'Clock News from 1984 while munching seven-day old Jaffa cakes you found in the back of your cupboard. Jeez, what a loser. What you need, my lazy friend, are some rave-inspired records to ramp up your energy.

Here are ten tracks that, in their own individual way, bring alive the energy of rave music. Some are more directly connected to rave, and will transport you back to the days of poppers and smiley faces. Others owe some kind of historic debt to rave culture: even if you didn't experience rave back in the day, these tunes should still evoke the pill-popping hypercoloured club culture of yore. 

The highlighted links should open to a YouTube video of that track.

808 State: Cubik
Following the success of their blissful and balaeric Pacific State, 808 State put out a series of singles with a harder energy. Cubik was an unlikely top ten hit because of its cranky square-wave chords, alarmist emergency sirens and wild guitar shreds. There's footage online of young ravers partying to Cubik at Stone Roses' infamous Spike Island gig. Perfect for throwing (cuboid) shapes to.

Altern-8: Infiltrate 202
This was the masked mavericks' first hit single, and it peaked at number 28 in July 1991, just behind a new entry from Frankie Knuckles' The Whistle Song and just ahead of a new entry from Bomb The Bass's Winter In July. Crumbs, what a chart. And what an anthem. Simplistic, geometric breakbeat shapes which felt quite comical at the time, but laid some pretty serious groundwork in commercial chart rave.

Bicep: Glue
The video for Bicep's nostalgia-bazooka Glue interspersed images of abandoned rave sites with quote captions from ex-ravers. "Never had a comedown like that one," reminisces one caption. "Best days of my life," says another. "Off my box with four cans of Stella," interrupts one wag, ruining the mood. Joe Wilson's video was a perfect foil to the Bicep boys' heart-wrenching breakbeats. What a comedown. 

Chase & Status: Blind Faith
Like the Chemical Brothers, Chase & Status's partnership can be traced back to their time at Manchester university. And like the Chemical Brothers, the pair tread a neat line in roof-shattering beats. Blind Faith was a huge hit from their breakthrough album No More Idols. It was a tribute to grubby warehouse rave, bolstered by Loleatta Holloway-style live vocals from Yola. Chase & Status gonna work it out.

Fatboy Slim: Eat, Sleep, Rave, Repeat
Norman Cook has enjoyed number one success in various guises, and I had plenty of choice for this list. His creativity knows no bounds, whether it's a caveman turning into a chubby lad or Christopher Walken walkin' weird. Three decades after he learnt bass so he could join the Housemartins, Mr Slim released this modern classic in tribute to the fours states of raving. It's like Eat, Pray, Love but with poppers.

Klaxons: Atlantis To Interzone
They may have just been a bunch of London indie kids, but they brought "new rave" to the masses and singlehandedly re-popularised glowsticks with the gigging public. The awkwardly-named Atlantis To Interzone enjoyed radio support but, incredibly, failed to make a dent in the UK charts. A travesty. They followed-up this tribute to rave with an ace cover of Grace's Perfecto Records classic Not Over Yet.

Nia Archives: Off Wiv Ya Headz
I could have included A-Trak's iconic remix of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' Heads Will Roll, but this junglist remix is irresistible. Nia Archives knocked up the track when trying to entertain crowds at Manchester's Warehouse Project, no mean feat considering the number of gurning bucket-hatters I've encountered there. If her name is new to you, dive into the Nia Archives archives immediately. Your rave heart will thank you.

Pet Shop Boys: Vocal
This might be a controversial one if you're a purist. And yes, I know Vocal has all the energy of your grandad pining for the days when the high street was all butchers and shoe shops. But this track has proper rave origins: the Boys say it was inspired by a clubbing venture in Brazil in the mid-1990s. They reflected this in the video by using footage from actual raves. A great tune from the domino dancers. 

Together: Hardcore Uproar
This John Carpenter-sampling classic was released on Pete Tong's brilliant FFRR label, It was the epitome of crossover rave bangers. That "ha-ha-hardcore uproar" voice? It's not a sample: it's just Suddi Raval's doing it directly into a mic. And the crowd cheers are from a Together live recording - in the background, you can hear Suddi shouting "yeeeeeah" to hype the crowd up. Rave to its very (hard)core.

The Streets: Weak Become Heroes
This list is almost in alphabetical order by artist, so we end up with The Streets. This is the best music act named after a road since, er, 'Don't Call Me Baby' hitmakers Madison Avenue. The downbeat Weak Become Heroes is Skinner's paeon to losing himself in the club and having a KFC afterwards. It's not a very ravey way to finish this list, but you can't have the smiley highs without the post-ecstasy crash.

Main blog picture: Altern-8

Further Fats: If it goes bleep, it may or may not be EDM (2013)

Further Fats: Just how DO you act at your first rave? (2019)

Plaything posters: Black Mirror goes full Designers Republic

The Plaything episode of Black Mirror is a love/hate letter to video games and artificial intelligence. It is also a tribute to the graphic genius of The Designers Republic.

In the episode, future national treasure Will Poulter plays visionary game designer Colin Ritman. At one point in the episode, we visit Ritman's office. His shelves are cluttered with framed posters featuring the work of the TDR graphic design studio, which is beloved of techno heads and console gamers.

While he talks to Lewis Gribben's games journalist character Cameron Walker, you can spot the following works:

○ An Aphex Twin poster
○ the cover of Polygon Window's Quoth
○ a rare poster for The Orb's Blue Room
○ the cover of Autechre's debut album Incunabula
○ a circle thing which I haven't identified yet
○ a "laugh vote die" poster referencing a previous Black Mirror episode
○ and, hidden behind Cameron, the cover of Warp's first volume of Artificial Intelligence.

In another shot, you can spot Autechre's album Amber.

There are The Designers Republic works elsewhere in this office. Notice the one with the pigtails? That's from a TDR takeover of Emigre magazine – issue 29, to be exact. The pigtailed mascot featured here is called Sissy. The poster further left with a similar colour scheme is a collage for the same publication and contains stream-of-consciousness gibberish such as "design or die!", "g7oba7 7anguag3 for th3 mazz3z" and a Sheffield '94 football ident.

On the same shelf, there's an impenetrable sheet of black and white logo designs. This is their Visual Symbolism Vol. 94 (1990-1994) collection of "new and used" logos which contains Pop Will Eat Itself icons, Sun Electric's typeface, and a tonne of visual blaps saying things like "have a nice day" and "e by gum" and "I love my DR".

There is more, of course, but if I delve further into this, I'll fall into some kind of Black Mirror plot matrix and I'll grown USB sticks for fingers or something. Anyway, it's smashing to see such an iconic design outfit represented on the telly.

Further Fats: The Designers Republic vs B12 Records – are the 1990s dead? (2009)

Further Fats: Chosen Words – D is for Design (2010)