Hounds Of Hulme: T_CHN_L_GY preview

They say music journalists are failed musicians, which suggests releasing an album may not be not such a good idea.

Then again, 50 'Thirty One Pounds And Eighty Six Pence At Current Exchange Rates' Cent said "I love you like a fat kid loves cake" which suggests to me all music journalists are failed cakes and I should go ahead and stick an album in the oven anyway.

On Friday August 3, the Hounds Of Hulme will release T_CHN_L_GY, which is months of me fiddling about with a very limited range of recording gear with an imaginary horse at my side. (See the list of band members on the site.) What's more, it will be utterly free to download or stream.

Here, dear reader, is a quick guide to what's on it. Hey, it's what the NME would do.

1 Strung Out - a bunch of psychotic people spiral aimlessly over music you may recognise from my 50 Shades Of Grey parody A Facial Sonata.

2 Reverse The Line - a steady builder of techno scrumminess with slightly sinister overtones.

3 FM Drop - an acid house tribute to old radio frequencies.

4 Don't Ask Me - sample-drenched old-school retro work-out.

5 Decade - de-tuned rave attack with choppy synths and a bleepy lead.

6 Acid Minors - a sweet acid-pop track with a deliberately formulaic pop structure.

7 Unsure - lyrics break apart over busy house music while Blurry Squirrel's harmonica meets a mysterious vocalist called Johnny Mobius

8 Hurtlovedandlost - a "diode-distressing" remix of No Ceremony's Hurtlove.

9 Rise of the Dead Robots - a seven-minute paeon to the machines, a 4/4 juggernaut (or at least, a well-serviced transit van).

10 Voiceinstruktion - short and sweet techno pop imploring you for a rewind. No retro stone is unturned.

11 Siren - simple arpeggios. Don't forget to take some cocktail-stick cheese and pineapple on your way out.