Dec 14, 2009

No new electronica in the singles chart, repeat to fade

Earlier this year, this blog carried a 'Chartwatch', in which I kept a sharp eye on the UK singles chart in a vain hope of Hyperdub scoring their first number one hit.

In the absence of any popular electronica anywhere, the Chartwatch feature became as desperate as it became bored: I canned it in the summer.

But I love you, dear Fat Roland On Electronica reader, and I want to have your alien lovechildren. So I preserved the text for you to read.

On the first anniversary of the very first Chartwatch, here is the whole dang thing in all its monocolour glory:

- Dec 14th 2008: No electronica of interest in the singles chart, unless you count Basshunter's Jingle Bells and Scooter vs Status Quo (?!).

- Dec 21st: The only vague bleepiness in the Christmas chart is Kanye West, whose album celebrates the Roland TR-808. Bah humbug.

- Dec 28th: No electronica in the chart because no-one has released anything. Aphex Twin has missed a trick there, I reckon.

- Jan 4th 2009: Some dirty synth action in Lady GaGa's Just Dance (highest new entry in this week's singles chart) but it's not really electronica.

- Jan 11th: This week's singles chart is about as electronica as a moustachio-clad tapeworm called Derek. Not impressed. (Lady GaGa got to number one.)

- Jan 18th: With a glut of electronica releases about to hit, maybe just maybe we'll get our first electronica hit of the year - coz there's naff all in this week's chart.

- Jan 25th: There is no electronica in this week's singles chart. Simply Red are in the top 40 album chart. I'm off for a cry.

- Feb 1st: I thought I saw the word "techno" in this week's chart - but turns out it's Coldplay's bloody Life In Technicolour. No electronica, then, in this week's singles chart.

- Feb 8th: There's electronica in the singles chart! Well. The Cadbury's advert music. At #75. It's kinda bodypop techno, but that'll do. The revolution starts here!

- Feb 15th: The Prodigy bring electronica (albeit commercial dancy electronica) to the singles chart with Omen, a new entry at UK#8.

- Feb 22nd: No new electronica in the singles chart. Just Coldplay copyists like Gary Go and U2. Yeah, Bono, you heard me right, deal with it.

- Mar 1st: The Prodigy have a second track in the chart this week, which is all very promising: but can we please get Autechre to number one, just for a change?

- Mar 8th: As a Stock Aitken And Waterman cover version sits astride the number one position in the singles chart (Flo Rida's execrable version of a Dead Or Alive song), the death-knell for all good music rings loud. In short, no new electronica in this week's chart.

- Mar 15th: Still no electronica in the singles chart. Is it too much to ask for a Drexciya re-release getting to number one?

- Mar 22nd: Royksopp in the top 60 is as electronica as it gets this week. At least it will give ad agencies something to put in their adverts.

- Mar 29th: Dear Music, I am disappointed at your continuing failure to provide underground electronica hit singles. I shall be writing to the techno ombudsman. Yours sincerely...

- April 26th: I took a momentary break while I recovered from Broken String's (James Morrison) return to the charts. Still no electronica, although the electro pop revolution continues (hello, Frankmusik).

- May 17th: Deadmau5 and Prodigy lead the dance stampede, although I'm still waiting for that Mu Ziq number one single...

- May 31st: Not much electronica in the charts, although Prodigy have been sniffing round the edges of the top ten recently and Dizzee Rascal's Bonkers has some delightfully techno moments.

- June 14th: Still no new electronica in the chart. What the hell is Bill Withers doing having a hit single? He's not IDM.

- June 21st: Two horrific Noisettes singles and not one paltry Warp Records release in the Top 40? There ain't no justice sometimes.

- July 19th: Have a look at what's number one in the singles chart. (I think this refers to JLS.) Seen it? If you're the last person to leave the country, please switch off the lights.

- A few weeks later: This item has now ended due to an exhausting seven month drought of IDM / electronica in the UK singles chart.

- December 20th: Aphex Twin is Christmas number one, narrowly beating the X Factor winner Joe Something-or-other to the top spot with an intense cover of Gary Glitter's Leader Of The Gang. (Okay, I just added this bit. But one can but hope, cannot one?)


jpm said...

These were the days

Fat Roland said...

Sheesh. I wasn't even *born* in 1978 ...ahem...